9

SPUN

i just found this on a site called "dear future me", so i borrowed it ~


Right now at this very moment all you can think about is your past and how you really haven't done much to improve yourself....You're contemplating whether you want to continue down the already beaten path from two years ago.....you are in love with the high.....even though everything about it is fake and will never stay like that forever....all this fun you're having right now will eventually fade and it'll just be a struggle again just to survive yourself .....this is so sad....you know exactly how this is going to end and yet that still doesnt stop you from unavoidably destroying yourself.....all you want right now at this point in your life is to be loved pretty much by everyone....rejection fucking destroys you...it doesnt matter who it is or why if someone doesnt want you or like you or whatever you turn into this freak that is just out to please everyone.....and then you look around and wonder why you feel so used up......

You're a liar too........come to think of it.....i think you've lied to every person that is important to you in your life at least twice this week....and its not some fucking petty white lie bullshit.....its full on fuck yourslef over lies if you get caught...which of course in the end you will.....one way or another.....once again you already know all this and you still continue to do it.....why? why? why?

FACE IT!! YOUR A FUCKING ADDICT.....just admit it already....you're weak and you can't just walk away from it...even after being sober for well over a year and seeing all that you saw and lived and felt and experienced so many amazing things and people---you still think being high is better....Won't someone just "lie to me Give me something worth living for Tell me a reason worth fighting for Give me anything Anything to keep me breathing"

What is it that scares you so much? Doyou do this to yourself out of fear....maybe when this is read in the future you will have some answers....hopefully you will still be alive.....remember when you never thought you were going to make it to 18...and you used to laugh at the thought of that....but here you are 19 years old...but still the same...hoping you'll make it to next year in one piece....you dont even care anymore about your stupid fucking rape case......you wish you never even told anyone about it.....maybe.no.of course things would be differnet....but instead they are like this....that stupid fucking guy....you have no clue what happend to you that night....no one really does....but you know...you know something very wrong happened that night....and there is nothing you can do about it at all.....just shove it in your closet with the rest of you ghosts and skeletons and hope it will collect just as much dust as everything else that you can't see it so you won't remember it............i don't know what the fuck I want to do with my life.......my brain and aching body just tells me to go get super fucking twacked out and forget about all this stupid shit......but my heart says.....well..........its says to fucking LEAVE agian....you don't know where....but you know if you run again it'll be a little better.....but youre still running....awww fuck it.....and fuck this stupid letter.....who do you think you are fooling??? NO ONE!!! you are never going to change.......no matter how hard you try....this -this thing-this problem -whatever it is-----addiction ( ugh...i hate that word....only because its the truth) and the truth always fucking hurts.......this shit will always follow you wherever you go.....i cant run forever......but thats all i know.......i'm tired

If today was your last day ~By Nickelback

My best friend gave me the best advice
He said each days a gift and not a given right
Leave no stone unturned
Leave your fears behind
And try to take the path less traveled by
That first step you take is the longest stride

If today was your last day
If tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday
Would you live each moment like your last
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have
If today was your last day

Going against the grain should be a way of life
What's worth the price is always worth the fight
Every second counts cause there's no second try
So live it like you're never living twice
Don't take the free ride in your whole life

If today was your last day
If tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday
Would you live each moment like your last
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have
And would you call old friends you never see
Reminisce old memories
Would you forgive your enemies
And would you find that one your dreaming of
Swear up and down to god above
That you'll finally fall in love
If today was your last day

If today was your last day
Would you make your mark
On ending a broken heart
You know it's never too late
To shoot for the stars
Regardless of who you are
So do whatever it takes
Cause you can't rewind
A moment in this life
Let nothing stand in your way
Cause the hands of time
Are never on your side

If today was your last day
If tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday
Would you live each moment like your last
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have
And would you call old friends you never see
Reminisce old memories
Would you forgive your enemies
And would you find that one your dreaming of
Swear up and down to god above
That you'll finally fall in love
If today was your last day

city of DESTINY?

Tacoma rejects mediation with Linnik family


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Share this story RUSS CARMACK THE NEWS TRIBUNE
Terapon Adhahn enters a Pierce County courtroom in April of 2008 to plead guilty to the abduction and murder of Zina Linnik, and to other rape cases. (Russ Carmack/The News Tribune file photo)
the_tacoma_ne850:http://www.thenewstribune.com/news/local/story/863060.html
Buzz up!

The City of Tacoma Monday refused mediation with the family of murder victim Zina Linnik after they approached the city about concerns they had with the investigation.
The city’s refusal, an attorney for the family said Monday, is flawed and amounts to taunting.
The Linnik family filed a $32 million claim in July, seeking to meet with the city and a mediator to discuss the investigation. Their claim alleged that the Tacoma Police Department and other agencies botched the investigation of Zina’s abduction and slaying, and their handling of murderer Terapon Dong Adhahn in earlier years.
The city, in letters released Monday, said there is no legal basis for damages and that the investigation is complete.
“The City recognizes that the Linnik family has suffered an incomprehensible and devastating loss,” City Manager Eric Anderson wrote in a letter to the City Council. “However, tragedy is not a basis for liability in a court of law, and the determined and professional actions of the Police Department in this case should be commended and must be defended.”
The Linniks’ attorney, Tyler K. Firkins of Auburn, said the family only wanted to meet to address issues that arose from the investigation. The family hadn’t heard of the city’s response until contacted by The News Tribune Monday.
“The city has refused to participate, instead preferring to taunt the Linnik family with their ‘Go ahead and sue us’ press release,” Firkins said Monday. “We are deeply disappointed with the city and their chosen method of responding to the family in its inquiry.”
Linnik, 12, was kidnapped on July 4, 2007, while walking in an alley behind her family’s Hilltop home. Zina’s father, Mikhail Linnik, saw a van speeding away and called 911. The van led investigators to Adhahn, a level one sex offender, handyman and truck driver who had been living in Parkland.
As part of a plea to avoid the death penalty, Adhahn led detectives to the girl’s body eight days after she was abducted. The Pierce County Medical Examiner ruled she was killed by a blow to the head.
In April 2008, Adhahn pleaded guilty to aggravated first-degree murder, first-degree kidnapping and first-degree rape and was sentenced to life without parole. The Linnik family’s claim focused on two main allegations:
• The city was negligent in making sure Adhahn registered as a sex offender. Firkins said Tacoma police knew Adhahn was living in the city, even though he had not registered as a sex offender at a Tacoma address. He was last registered in 2002 in Spanaway, and had not registered for 12 years before then even though he was known to have been in Tacoma.
“The 12-year gap in Adhahn’s registration made two things apparent: he did not take the registration requirement seriously, and neither did law enforcement,” the claim alleges. “Whe he moved, he chose not to update his registration again. Again, no one cared, and no one came looking.”
In response, City Attorney Elizabeth Pauli wrote that the state sex offender law does not allow for negligence claims against the city.
• Police waited too long to release an AMBER alert.
The Linnik family alleged in the claim that precious time, which could have been used to alert the public about Zina’s disappearance, was wasted as police put off releasing an alert about the kidnapping. The department had been trained that it is important to release such an alert early, but ignored that training in the Linnik case, Firkins said. It took the department 13 hours to release the information.
“Because 75 percent of children abducted and killed by strangers are murdered within the first three hours, time is of the essence in an AMBER alert,” the claim states.
“Tacoma police personnel received extensive training on AMBER alert procedures at a conference in Hawaii a few weeks before Zina’s kidnapping, learning, among other things, that time is of the essence in stranger abduction cases. It is not known whether the officers actually attended conference sessions, or merely enjoyed a subsidized vacation in the 50th state.”
The city responded that departments are not legally obligated to use the AMBER alert program. The U.S. Department of Justice training for departments makes recommendations, but they are not legally binding.
“Since its inception, the Department of Justice has consistently characterized the AMBER Alert program as voluntary and has only issued recommendations for local law enforcement programs,” Pauli wrote.
But even so, the city says the alert was released at the right time for the investigation, and that there is no evidence that had an alert been issued earlier, it would have saved Zinnik’s life.
Firkins said the family also filed claims with Pierce County and the state of Washington. He would not comment about those discussions, but said he will work with the family to figure out the next step with the City of Tacoma.
“It was an invitation to participate in early mediation,” he said regarding the initial claim. “Their response was ‘I’ll see you in court.’ “
The city, however, said in the response that the investigation was thorough, that there was no negligence and mediation is not needed.

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